New Year

Well it is officially 2011, and My New Year was quite fun. I hung out with four boys, watched movies and three of them play poker at Midnight we went outside and set off 2 fireworks that were of questionable legality... (and only two because it was FREEZING COLD outside!!!!) then went back to Mike and Justin's and watched an episode of supernatural and I almost fell asleep on their couch. (and by almost i basically did, but Justin woke me up so i could go home.) I also had much fun earlier in the evening when i got off work. First my car was frozen shut so Cheryl sent Raymond out to help me get it open. Then i thought i would let the inside warm up while i scraped off the outside...genius I am i locked my keys in my car WITH it running (and i was almost out of gas) So after trying to call mulitple people and no one answering their phones, I went back inside the store to see if anyone was on break and could run me home. Thankfully Hailey was and I asked Cheryl if she could be a little bit late back from break because i needed to go home and get my spare key. Mike was on the present Window and my car was also parked on that side of the store, so I asked him if he could keep an eye on my car while i ran home, at which point he handed me his keys offering to let me take his car. but Hailey was already back up front with her keys. So we hurry home and I run back, spending Christmas money on gas so that i could have enough in my car. Needless to say it was an adventure. Which life is full of. I'm looking forward to a New Year, full of new Adventures, and trying to Learn from all the adventures that i had last year.

Back Home

So for Christmas I flew to Texas to see my family, which was great fun. I sang in church, went to Which Wich and this store called Sam Moon. (don't send me in there with money, i will buy something completely useless because it was entertaining me at the current moment) Kim flew home a few days early. And then just spent the week with the family. Christmas was fun, we all fell asleep on the family room floor after presents. Then came flying home, i managed to get an earlier flight (and buy earlier i mean i got home earlier because i didn't have to layover in Vegas) then Mike, being the amazing wonderful friend he is picked me up from the airport to give me a ride home and swung by my grandmas on the way so i could pick up my guitar that i got for Christmas. Then we went by work to pick up paychecks and get our schedules, then i went to his place and played with him and his roommates the rest if the night. Loving being home. Don't get me wrong, i loved seeing my family again, but Logan is home and I'm loving not have to worry about classes and just playing with friends. I was introduced to the show community, so funny.
The fact that Mike and Justin let me come play is wonderful because there is really not a lot of other people back in Logan yet. And really no one in my building. So i have somewhere to go for human contact. So last night i went over hopong that we were going to start our supernatural-a-thon, and I got to see Justin with Dayna (his friend who is a girl, that they have decided they have mutual interest in each other and are both interested in pursuing a relationship but they aren't official yet.) THEY ARE SO STINKING CUTE TOGETHER!! it is so much fun to watch Justins face when he is looking at her because his eyes just light up and he has a little smile dancing around his mouth. And basically they are just so cute together and i am very very very happy for both of them.
Then later Chris and Rylee pop up out of no where and they are so cute together. and basically everyone around me is starting to be in relationships and they are all so cute together, and i'm happy for them. it just sucks sometimes when you are always the single friend. But whatever, i'm still happy for them. :) And basically as much as i miss my family, I love being home again.

Finals Week

I really don't remember my brain every being as mushified as it was Wednesday night. (Yes, mushified is a word) Especially after my jury. Wednesday I had my US history final, my voice Jury and a piano recital. Did i really study for history? ...no...not really. But i survived jury, which made me very happy and they even picked the song i wanted them to pick. How lucky can you get?
But i seriously can't remember a time in my life where i couldn't think like i couldn't Wednesday. After my recital me and Megan went over to Mike and Justin's. We made bacon and hash browns (yeah, the low-carb diet i just got put on kinda got shot that night.) and watched supernatural and then talked and laughed, it was great fun. It was the one day i had off this week.
Basically i'm really excited to go home tomorrow. (i know i'm really rambly, but i'm honestly just killing time before i head to my next final. THE FINAL FINAL!!!!) (I"m also on a keyboard i'm not use to, so forgive my excessive typos.)
I also loved work last night. I worked with Julie, which doesn't happen very often anymore. And we were slow enough i didn't want to kill myself and busy enough that i didn't want to kill myself. The only annoying thing is that i was on present for five hours. I just get sick of the beep after the first hour or so. And stupid customers...but they can't be helped. Your working with the general public.
Sorry my blog is rambly and pointless today...i just haven't had any profound breakthroughs that I've felt a need to blog about, I've been terrible at writing in my journal too. Basically I don't have much to say right now. I'll come up with something better later.

Employee of the Month.

Yeah...thats me for December. It weird, and they won't let me turn the plaque around when i'm on counter. I think its weird having my picture right there. I mean i'm flattered, and I'm glad to know i'm a good worker. The first day all the rest of the managers found out a lot of them were so happy and thrilled and telling me that they know that i deserve it. Its flattering but weird.
Its interesting, i've been there almost seven months now. I'm a veteran. I worked in grill last night for one of the first times. I like it back there. I don't have annoying beeps in my ear. But i've decided running is my favorite position. and I'm good at it. Well, i try to be at least. But i've discovered they are tending to put me places where they need things to speed up. If OT fries is behind on fries, i get there spot. If present is behind i get put on present. If hole is slow i get thwon back in the hole (although, they don't put me back there very often anymore. Which is usually nice, especially in the cold winter.) And now i'm also starting to train people on counter a lot...although i think the reason they like me training people on counter is i show them a few orders, and where stuff is and let them see me do a few and then i make them take orders within the first ten-fifteen minutes they are on counter. But the only way you learn is by just doing it.
And thats my story.

Black Friday.

SO this lovely black Friday morning, I had the..."opportunity" to go into work at Four am....thats really early. Just so you know.
SO i clock in at 3:50 and start helping with last minute stuff. My manager asked me to go tray the cookies, and we had probably 16-24 cookies i put on the tray, as I walk back up front to put them away someone had just mopped the floor and I completely biffed it, dropping every single cookie. I did however manage to save the glass tray they were one.

As soon as we turned on our headsets and were "open" we had customers. And we would have customers for the next seven hours without stopping. However one loving co-worker brought in a whole bunch of krisp kreme donuts. Which was AWESOME!!!

People were surprisngly nice and apparently we were really slow for Black Friday. Around 11 we slowed way way down and so Julie started sending people home. Originally they asked me to stay until two because a co-worker had gotten in an accident and couldn't come in. But Julie ended up sending me home about ten to noon.

At which point i cam home and slept until four. Which was wonderful.

Giving Thanks

So naturally, as i'm sure half the planet does, i want to make a blog post about all the things i am thankful for.

I am thankful for a University and a Music Program that are making me a better person, student and musician. I am grateful for the professors, especially the ones with high expectations. I am grateful for the other music majors who are becoming good friends. I am grateful for the ability to influence others with my voice, and learning how to on the piano.

I am thankful for my family. A mom and dad who help me out, even when they don't have the means sometimes. An older sister who teaches me perspective. A younger sister and brother that i get to protect and learn from. A grandma who takes very good care of me. Cousins who do the same. Aunts who decide i need to go see a movie. And all the rest of them that i can't describe everything they do for me.

I am thankful for the incredible friends the Lord has seen fit to put into my life. Mike and Justin who take far to good of care of me. Who will try to take me grocery shopping, or tell me i'm staying for dinner or just make me smile when i'm having a bad day. Amber who gives me so much perspective and knowledge and just a hug when i need it most. Megan who will let me borrow hair styling devices in my feeble attempt to become a girl. Cyri who will always give me a hug, a smile, and an invitation to run away for the weekend to her families if i ever need it. Dani who has been one of my best friends since ninth grade and we still talk. Kelsie who was suppose to be my roommate but then went on got married on me. But will still listen whenever i'm having a bad day and continues to do so much for me. And all the others that i can't possibly name off.

I am thankful for institute. I learn so much, feel the spirit and always have incredible teachers. Classes are full of laughter and learning and I never regret going.

I am thankful for the Gosple, it has given me so much in life, and i can't even express how grateful I am to have it in my life.

I am thankful for the opportunity to serve, it helps me remember that its not all about me. There are other people with other problems and mine all the sudden don't seem so unmanageable anymore. Plus i love to see people smile, and I like to be able to put that smile there.

I am thankful for thank-you notes. They are what make things worth it sometimes. Because who really needs big recognition? I always like it when something is between two or few people.

I am thankful for indoor plumbing...nough said.

I am thankful for blankets and warm clothes.

I am thankful for my car, however much it tries to die on me.

I am thankful for alarm clocks.

I am thankful for leftovers.

I am thankful for sleep.

I am thankful for being able to be productive.

I am thankful for the customers that are friendly.

I am thankful for co-workers.

I am thankful for heaters.

I am thankful for hot chocolate.

I am thankful for cheap entertainment.

I am thankful for naps.

I am thankful for shoes.

I am thankful for the little tender mercies in life, a smile, a laugh, a joke. The light in a childs eyes.

I am thankful for the opportunity to witness and sometimes be a part of miracles.

I am thankful for the angels the Lord puts in my life and that he trusts me enough to be an angel for someone else sometimes.

I can't possibly put everything i am grateful for, but here is some of it. Sometimes its nice just to write it all out.

this is me, writing my research paper...

So yeah, i have this research paper due on Monday...am I working on it right now? ...Not really... DO i need to be...yes. But life decided to get crazy on me these last three weeks when i was suppose to be writing it. The only hard part is the research, i just need to find reliable sources, after that i can write the paper in an hour or so. I'll get it figured out.
These last few weeks have been a blur, i didn't even realize how long it's been since I've written in my blog since my dad told me i haven't written anything new in two weeks. ( i didn't know that anyone was even reading it.)
Although one reason i haven't written is i haven't really had anything much to say. Its been stressful and chaotic the last few weeks with me almost breaking down into melt downs on an almost daily basis, but only actually having a few.
Maybe i should tell you what I've learned about tender mercies. I can't believe how many of them I've had in my life and I'm so glad I've been blessed to recognize them.
Because even amongst all the melt downs and stress there is always someone or something there to make me smile. One day i was having a particularly bad morning, it was a Friday morning. And i was honestly just having a bad day. The night before had been hard the morning had been hard (i had gotten up early to finish homework i hadn't done the night before.) I walked out and was sure that i had a parking ticket on my car (and the root of my bad day was financially based.) i almost broke down on the walk to school, instead i turned my headphones up really loud and let music be the only thing in my head. (was it the most happy or uplifting of music? of course not, i was in a bad mood. So it was songs like "face down" by jumpsuit apparatus or "pretty girl" by sugarcult) And then I got to class, and i realized that friday night i had no work, and no plans and no one i knew that i could really go do anything with. But i ran into some old roommates and decided "hey, they are going a multi-stake dance, maybe i'll tag along with them. So i had something to do, and who knows maybe it would be my lucky night and i could meet a guy." (not likely, but still slightly possible) then i was in music theory and we were getting mid-terms back. I was like "awesome, because my day isn't bad enough." (you can tell that i thought i did well on it) And then i got it back with an A on it. which made me happier. then i went to classes. And my phone starts ringing in keyboard harmony. I take it out long enough to see who it is, and its McDonalds calling me. Well, i can't answer it cause i'm in class. So i put it back in my pocket a minute later it buzzes in my pocket telling me I have a voice mail. So between classes i check it and they want to know if i can come in and work (it was the first Friday night i'd had off without requesting it off in I don't know how long. (plus i had to work the next morning) But i decided i needed the money more than i needed my sanity. So i surrender my Friday night to six hours of work. So i call work and tell them i can take the shift, and then my manager tells me that they are going to pay for my dinner for taking the shift. Which was very nice of them, i got a real dinner for once.
When i got to work Mike was also working that night, and Cheryl was on shift and had to put people back in the hole, but she felt bad so she put me and Mike back there together. I think everyone knew i was having a bad day (i wasn't really trying to hide it) and so while we're back in the hole Mike kept doing things that made me smile and laugh, so i couldn't really stay in a completely bad mood. i like that people at work were doing things that made me smile and laugh. Although it all caught up to me before i even made it out to my car, for those six hours people were making life bearable.
And this is what i've learned. There are always things that will make life good, a little better. Sometimes they are major, but usually they are quite small. Especially when everything in life is going wrong. You have to learn how to see them. I decided i started learning to see them when i actually kept my happy thoughts notebook.
That was a notebook i would keep and i would write down little things that made me smile during the day. When i started making it i never realized that i was teaching myself to look and see and realize the little things that make life easier. But i stopped keeping it, mostly because i got behind and i knew there was no way i could go back and write them all in and i didn't really know where to start to get back on But i've learned that i notice them now without really looking for them. I just see them, and all those really very minor things make life so much easier when everything is Majorly going wrong.
The same thing happened on Thursday, I was once again having a terrible day (stress tends to do this to me) and i ran into an old friend on campus that i never see and we were just chatting and registration came up and i mentioned how i couldn't register yet and it was just hard right now. But its ok, trying to write it off as less than it really was, but she really didn't by it and so mid sentance she just pulled me into a hug. And it was what i needed.
long story short, there are always small tender mercies, sometimes its watching the light in a child's eyes as they laugh. Or having half a tank of gas. Maybe just a smile that some gives you.
and sometimes its just knowing that you have people that care about you.